I am the owner and author of my life. I belong to my life and that life belongs to me. I accept the responsibility for what my life became, for the changes I made, for today’s realities, and for the expectancy of my future. These three lines reflect the beginning of relationship to myself.
Are you the author of your life? I want to know if you feel as if a stranger has overtaken what was once yours and has done so uninvited? Do you recognize the pieces that make up your life, relationships, career, and family? This morning, did you really know the image in the mirror or might you be feeling lost somehow, but without understanding as to how you arrived in this place?
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I once believed that truth was found in what I could see, but I was wrong. Over time, I learned truth must be unearthed so to speak. It has to be sought relentlessly. Even when discovered, personal truth had to be observed, questioned, left, and revisited until I was certain the wisdom it held was indeed right for me. In the beginning of my own journey, I mistakenly assumed it was about others, even though I was in hurtful situations. Years later, it has become clear that my difficulty with others was a reflection of my difficulty with myself.
This is troublesome to fully grasp, especially when in the midst of painful circumstances. For me, part of the reason I was experiencing trying times is that on an unconscious level, I believed it was somehow what I deserved. However, if anyone had asked, I would have refuted the validity of that belief. Don’t get me wrong, there were many parts of my life that were not chosen and therefore felt like they were beyond my control. I believed I was unable to direct the course of my life. So, my task became to discover and develop my self-confidence and personal power. I had to empower myself to not only recognize the life of my belonging, but also to have the courage to live it.
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As I write this, I have friends who are finding the strength to address diversions from their true life. They are building new careers, new relationships, leaving old behaviors, and making new discoveries about who they are and what they bring to the world. They are risking everything they have known before and welcoming an unknown future. And, they inspire me and others who know them to do the same.
Today, you may be standing at the threshold of your future. You may be feeling frightened, uncertain, and alienated from the life to which you belong. As someone who has traveled a difficult journey, you can meet the challenges of the road ahead. And, I am confident the journey to yourself, to a life you can recognize, and a life you can live courageously is worth every unsteady, joyful step.
BY ANITA MARTIN | Love Magazine
