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How Many People Should You Have Sex With?

 

So you think you've found The One…but you're not sure you've amassed enough bedroom experience to feel fulfilled with just "One" for the rest of your life. Or perhaps you're insecure about the seemingly large number of sexual partners your new romantic interest has already been with. Just how much sex should a person have in his or her lifetime?

According to a poll of 1000 male and female SeekingArrangements.com members, the perfect number of total partners is ten. And TheFrisky.com revealed that most women feel uncomfortable dating men who have slept with more than 25 ladies. Yet CDC data shows that American males aged 25 to 44 have actually had sex with a median of six women, while females of the same age have had sex with a median of four men.

Perhaps you've already guessed where I'm going with this, but I don't believe there's a definitive number of sexual partners a person should aim for before tying the knot. Sexual experience can be highly subjective – some still won't feel satisfied after sleeping with dozens of people, while others are quite comfortable being with only one person their entire life.

However, there are a few factors that will determine your own unique "magic number." For one thing, strong religious beliefs might dictate elements of an individual's sex life, or might even restrict someone from engaging in sex before marriage altogether. On the other hand, some simply have more elevated sex drives than others, requiring a wider variety of partners and more regular encounters. And finally, everyone moves at a different speed, maturing at a different rate. One man might be ready for sex earlier in a relationship (and at a younger age) than his friend.

But you should never feel obliged to have sex for any reason but honest desire. Whatever rules you may believe society maintains for sex have nothing to do with your personal development. The "right" amount of sexual experience is less about hitting a specific numerical goal, and all about feeling good about the quality of sexual exploration that's been had. Have you experimented with different scenarios, positions, and relationship roles? For many people, satisfaction in those categories can be reached with just a few partners.

Ultimately, the best advice I can give boils down to this: When single, live (safely!) without regrets -- but don't be afraid to dive into a relationship and commit to true love when the opportunity does come along. Your own gut will dictate what's right for you.



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Love Magazine: How Many People Should You Have Sex With?
How Many People Should You Have Sex With?
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