Making friends at work is a good thing
but there is a chance that one of you will get promoted and even have
to manage the other. If your friend becomes the boss, the dynamic in
your friendship will change. Then what? Here are ways on how to deal.
Get a Handle On Any Feelings of Jealousy You Might Have
If you and your pal were equals before the promotion, you might be feeling a tinge of jealousy
over their career boost. Perhaps you even were going for the same
position and now your friend not only got the promotion you wanted but
they will be your new boss. A double reason to feel envious, which is
understandable, and all the more cause for making sure you get a handle
on jealousy early.
Just because you feel the negative emotions associated with jealousy doesn’t mean you need to act on them. Don’t lash out at your friend
(who will now also be your boss) and instead be supportive. You don’t
have to pretend to be ecstatic, which your friend will know is fake, but
be kind but genuine in your disappointment.
You could say something like:
“I’m bummed I didn’t get the job, but I know you will make a great boss. I’m happy for you.”
It
may take you a while to work through your feelings of jealousy but in
the meantime don’t pit other workers against your friend. Be the type of
friend you’d want them to be if the situation was reversed.
Step Up Your Game at Work
Don’t
slack off now that your friend is the boss. Your friend might not think
you’re the best worker when it’s all said and done. Perhaps they
listened to your gripes when you two were on equal footing, but now that
they’re the boss they need to look at things more objectively and can’t
give you preferential treatment.
What’s more, you’ll be looked at more closely for favoritism when your friend becomes the boss, so stop the gossip mongers in
the officer cold but simply being a great worker who earns every kudos
and raise. Become such a positive employee that there is no question
that you are valuable, regardless of the fact that your friend is the
boss.
Talk it Through With Your Friend
One
mistake friends make during a promotion is to ignore it. They think they
can carry on as if nothing ever happened. While that’s admirable it
isn’t exactly realistic because feelings never go away just because you
don’t talk about them.
Your friendship will change when your friend gets promoted so address it head on to make sure the boundaries in your relationship
stay comfortable for both of you and to let your friend know what
you’re thinking about the situation. It’s important to let them know you
realize things are different now but you want to remain friends.
Keep Your Friendship Sacred and Don’t Spill Details of Their Life
When
you are a friend, you hear things. Your friend tells you what they
really think about their spouses or career, and you’re expected to keep
these confidences to yourself always. Even when your friend becomes the
boss.
It might be tempting to talk about certain secrets
(especially if you’re irritated at your friend’s new position) but when
you hear a secret it should always remain a secret. You owe your friend
that.
Rethink Your Office Friendships
If you and your pal were office BFFs, make an effort to get to know the others in the office.
Your friend will need to make some new friends at their management
level and so will you. This actually helps you and your pal stay friends
in the long run. With new people in your social circle you’ll be able to stay friends outside of work much easier.
For
instance, if you and your pal used to go to lunch together every day,
you have to admit that it probably wouldn’t look good for you to do the
same thing now. If you have others in the office you can hang out with,
you’ll be able to move through this new season of change quicker than if
you resisted things and insisted on trying to keep things the way they
were.
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source: about.com
