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| © Flickr / Pedro Ribeiro Simões It's common for couples to daydream about what their lives will look like when the distance ends, but it is important to discuss specifics with your partner so that your future together can harden into something solid and reliable. Of course, you can't anticipate the future, but it's good to have certain goals for what your relationship will look like when you live together. You can discuss the types of dates you'd like to go on, whether it's a night out at the movies or proving once and for all that you're a mini golf champion. Through discussions, you can better understand whether your partner is introverted or extroverted in a domestic setting, and begin to temper expectations for a routine that will work best for both you and your partner. Keep an open mind, but feel free to talk about where you'd like to live or what names you could give your future dog. Depending on how far along you are in your relationship, it is crucial to bring up the possibility of eventually having children or getting married to make sure that you and your partner are on the same page about what you want. These subjects can be hard to discuss from a distance, but they're important topics that will affect the outcome of your relationship in the long run. |
By Chelsea Greenwood, INSIDER
- When a partner cheats, it can be difficult to figure out what to do next.
- For some, forgiveness is one option.
- From therapy to oaths, these women found a way to move forward with their relationships.
When someone cheats, it can be very difficult for the individuals in a relationship to recover.
While some people choose to end a relationship with someone who has cheated, others find ways to forgive their partner and move forward. Here, 10 women share how and why they forgave their partners for cheating - for better or worse.
Although INSIDER can't independently verify any of the stories, they are interesting to read.
"He worked his butt off to be a better person in general."
"He worked his butt off to be a better person in general. It wasn't just for me - it was for him and his future, which I think made the biggest difference. We worked intensely on our communication. Six years later, we are 1,000 times happier than we were before he cheated. It brought us closer." - Redditor Gurtyy
"He wanted better for us and vowed to change."
"It's been over four years since the cheating, and what I think really made it work was [him seeing the apartment I got in a dangerous neighborhood] … it really hit him hard that this was where we were. He said he did not want his girlfriend and son living in this apartment.
"He wanted better for us and vowed to change, and he did. We have been together for 13 years ... we are happy with the way things are now. I trust him 100%, and he trusts me as well." - Redditor Mango2407
"You just kissed a girl at midnight. Whatever."
"I forgave him after I found out about the first time he cheated on me. He was drunk at a New Year's Eve party, and he told me he kissed another girl. So I [said], 'It's not a big deal. You just kissed a girl at midnight. Whatever.'" - Redditor ThisIsNotAConspiracy
"If he had tried to hide it or it was a recurring thing, it wouldn't have turned out the same."
"I forgave my significant other after [he cheated]. He told me about it the morning after it happened. If he had tried to hide it or it was a recurring thing, it wouldn't have turned out the same. Sometimes, it works out. I'm very optimistic about our future together." - Redditor BamboozledBean
"I started putting effort into the counseling, and both of our walls came down."
"I found out my husband cheated, and then admitted I had also. I wanted a divorce, he didn't. I agreed to go to counseling but also met with a divorce attorney. I don't know if it was the greatest or worst divorce attorney, but she spoke so hatefully of my husband that it angered me, and it was then I realized I still loved him.
"I started putting some effort into the counseling, and both of our walls came down. It was hard. But, it's been seven years ... and we have the best marriage out of anyone I know. I trust him completely. We cheated because our relationship was s----- and we weren't putting any effort into it. Now it's wonderful, and I wouldn't do a thing to screw it up." - Redditor vbbex
"We were both hurt, but not as mad as we would have expected."
"We both cheated while he was doing a study abroad. We both confessed when he got home. We were both hurt, but not as mad as we would have expected. We started discussing non-monogamy and eight years later we are polyamorous." - Redditor laidymondegreen
"He has proven over and over that it was a one-time thing ..."
"He had been sexting another girl and met up with her once. It destroyed us for a while, and I still get twinges of distrust. But, he has proven over and over that it was a one time-thing, spurred on by our mutual depression and stressful relationship. He makes sure I am always comfortable with what is going on.
"If I get kind of suspicious, he will show me his phone any time. I don't ask to or even accept his offer to look anymore. We love each other very much, and I would say our relationship is very healthy. If anything, it helped us. We both learned to work on ourselves. We communicate better. We give each other 100%." - Redditor overlordkim
"We've both done idiotic, unforgivable things, but we're so much better together than apart."
"He cheated with the same woman a couple of times after we had been together for about six years. I had no idea until he told me about two years later. We got married about a year after that. We've been married almost 15 years now and we're still going strong.
"Honestly, I almost never think about it. Maybe I'm the exception, but the whole, 'You'll never be able to look at them the same way or be able to trust them,' never rang true for me. We've both done idiotic, unforgivable things, but we're so much better together than apart." - Redditor Throwingaway-222
"I think since he told me right away and didn't try to hide it made it easier."
"We were married less than a year. It was the hardest year of my life. He went to watch a sporting event with his friends and he didn't come back that night. He called me in the morning and told me what happened. After a lot of counseling and fighting we are still married 20 years and two kids later. I think since he told me right away and didn't try to hide it made it easier." - Redditor TheMiddlecouldbeme
"Everyone said to talk it out. We did, and we're still together."
"I found out about a year also into our marriage. I found text messages on his phone and kept seeing the same number on my bill. I confronted him when I had the copies of the bills ... It was hard and I kicked him about for about six months. But, his mom and everyone said to talk it out. We did … and we're still together." - Redditor Blastgirl69
