Happy, loving relationships do not just happen.
Loving relationships are the result of choices. Couples that have a very good relationship are not just lucky. Successful, loving relationships
do not just happen. The couples that have loving relationships are
taking specific actions that people in unsuccessful relationships are
not taking. Doing these five actions is how to have a successful
relationship...
[post_ads_2]1. They treat themselves and their partners with kindness.
Think
for a moment about how you go through your day. Are you focused on what
you don’t like in yourself or your partner? Do you spend much of your
thinking time judging yourself or your partner? Or, do you make the spiritual attribute of kindness to yourself and others, including your partner, your highest priority
People in successful relationships
treat themselves and their partner with kindness—kind words, kind
actions, kind looks, kind listening, and kind thoughts. It is far more
important to them to be kind than to try to control their partner with
anger, judgment, criticism, irritation, blame, resistance, or
withdrawal.
2. They take personal responsibility for their own feelings.
People in loving relationships do not make their partner responsible for their feelings.
When they feel angry, hurt, anxious, depressed, resentful, irritated,
guilty, or shamed, they look within at their own thoughts and behavior
that may be causing their painful feelings.
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They
don't see themselves as victims of their partner’s choices. Rather,
they learn how to manage their own feelings without dumping their upset
on their partner. When they can’t manage their own feelings, they get
the help they need rather than dump anger, blame, anxiety or depression
onto their partner.
3. They take responsibility for managing their time and space in ways that work for themselves and their partner.
They make sure they have enough time with each other
to talk, learn, resolve conflict, play, and make love. The make sure
they have time with children, time for chores, time for work and time
for relaxation.
They take care of
their mutual living spaces in ways that respect their partner’s needs.
If one partner tends to be neat and the other messy, they both strive to
make their living environment pleasant for both of them rather than
either of them complying, controlling, or resisting. Because their
highest priority is showing kindness to themselves and each other, they
are motivated to discover ways of living together that meets both of
their needs.
4. They learn how to manage their money in ways that don't create stress for themselves or their partner.
Successful learn how to manage their money
in ways that do not create stress for themselves or their partner. They
decide mutually if both of them will work or not. Neither partner makes
unilateral financial decisions that have a negative effect on the other
partner.
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In successful relationships,
one partner does not spend money in such as way as to create stress for
the other person. Loving partners mutually decide on their budget and
then both of them stick to it.
5. They strive to take care of their physical health.
When two people care deeply about themselves and each other, they strive to take care of their physical health. Loving partners do not behave in ways that cause their partner to fear for their wellbeing.
They
don't take unnecessary risks, such as riding a motorcycle without a
helmet. They don’t drink and drive. They eat well, get enough exercise,
and don’t smoke. People in loving relationships do not want their
partner to suffer the grief of their loss through premature illness, so
they strive to take good care of themselves—partly out of caring for
themselves, and partly out of caring for their partner.
Once again, successful relationships don’t just happen.
They are the result of each person taking physical, emotional,
financial, organizational, and spiritual responsibility within their
relationship.
